Monday, April 11, 2011
Bubbles Help Eliminate Parental Alienation for Kids - April 25, 2011
http://www.wfaa.com/good-morning-texas/How-Bubbles-119599814.html
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
Kids Aiding Parental Alienation Awareness Organization
http://kapaao.paawareness.org/content.asp?DocID=2&CatID=2
Monday, April 4, 2011
Bubbles Of Love Day DFW... Parental Alienation Awareness Day April 25, 2011
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SGnKUAaT9wg
Friday, March 18, 2011
If We Love Our Children From A Distance, How Do We Know They Feel Our Love?
In a day in which parents and children are sometimes forced to love one another from a distance, the non-custodial mother’s question was certainly a valid one. “If we love our children from a distance, how do we know they feel our love?” College educated, the former Primary Caretaker of the child is now living the horror of her child being placed with their abuser. She struggled for answers. The idea of loving her child from a distance was perplexing. She demanded confirmation that her daughter absolutely knows she loves her everyday of her life. In short, she said she does not believe loving from a distance works because we have no guarantee our child feels it.
Is it supposed to “work?” Isn’t loving our children- regardless of the abduction, unfair custody rulings, defaults, interference, false allegations, abuse, distance and years, supposed to come naturally? Our circumstances do not define us. Sure, they can limit and frustrate us. They can cause hatred to grow in our alienated children. Circumstances imposed by the courts, the other parent’s abusive actions and even our adult children, can crush our spirits and rip our hearts to shreds. Still, it does not mean love cannot remain intact in our hearts. We can still love, even if we are separated across the miles. We can still love even if we saw our newborn for a few mere minutes at birth. We can love our children with every fiber of our being in what feels like the most hopeless of circumstances. This is within our control.
It is when we stop loving that we have somehow become inhumane. When we become submissive to the courts, allowing these strangers to chip away at the core of our being and when we allow the infiltration and tainting of our hearts, we have lost a piece of ourselves. It is when we eventually give in to these restrictions that the courts will have successfully chipped away at the core of us. As mothers, fathers, extended family and as human beings, we deserve better. Our children especially deserve family who can love completely.
Do our children really “feel” our love? Some of the greatest things in this world are invisible to the naked eye. People feel the prayers of others…why wouldn’t they feel love from a distance? Sometimes loving in this manner is all we have left. I promise you too, that it is possible to cling to this thread of hope and derive strength from it for many years. In fact, for the rest of our lives, if necessary. Our love for our children may serve as a reason to get out of bed and face each day. It may be the first thing we feel of the morning and the last thing at night.
As humans, it is instinctive - in most of us, to naturally make the best of the worst of circumstances. No matter how we must love, the important thing is that we do it. To not analyze or question...to not be so suspicious that our hearts are more consumed with doubt, anger and revenge than providing pure, nurturing love to our children.
Do not make love difficult. Let it flow. It is so simple...it just requires opening our hearts. This is not as much about the child receiving love and “feeling” it, as it is about us as parents and loved ones, giving the love and having faith it will be felt. Should we really attempt to close down our hearts because we believe the child will not feel our love, anyway? It is important to remember that our love can only be boundless if we allow it to soar.
Do our children feel our love? Perhaps sometimes we are not supposed to know all of the answers. There are certainly no guarantees in this life. There is faith, though- especially faith that our children will feel our visible or invisible presence. That tonight, our child will wish upon the same star in the sky, as us. Or, that tomorrow, a particular song on the radio or picture in an album will remind our daughter or son of us. Instead of wondering if our children feel our love, perhaps it is time to stand firm in our belief that no person or circumstance on this earth, will cause us to doubt our love is not only felt, but reciprocated. If we wonder if our children feel our love, wouldn’t it make sense that our children wonder if we feel theirs?
.
Is it supposed to “work?” Isn’t loving our children- regardless of the abduction, unfair custody rulings, defaults, interference, false allegations, abuse, distance and years, supposed to come naturally? Our circumstances do not define us. Sure, they can limit and frustrate us. They can cause hatred to grow in our alienated children. Circumstances imposed by the courts, the other parent’s abusive actions and even our adult children, can crush our spirits and rip our hearts to shreds. Still, it does not mean love cannot remain intact in our hearts. We can still love, even if we are separated across the miles. We can still love even if we saw our newborn for a few mere minutes at birth. We can love our children with every fiber of our being in what feels like the most hopeless of circumstances. This is within our control.
It is when we stop loving that we have somehow become inhumane. When we become submissive to the courts, allowing these strangers to chip away at the core of our being and when we allow the infiltration and tainting of our hearts, we have lost a piece of ourselves. It is when we eventually give in to these restrictions that the courts will have successfully chipped away at the core of us. As mothers, fathers, extended family and as human beings, we deserve better. Our children especially deserve family who can love completely.
Do our children really “feel” our love? Some of the greatest things in this world are invisible to the naked eye. People feel the prayers of others…why wouldn’t they feel love from a distance? Sometimes loving in this manner is all we have left. I promise you too, that it is possible to cling to this thread of hope and derive strength from it for many years. In fact, for the rest of our lives, if necessary. Our love for our children may serve as a reason to get out of bed and face each day. It may be the first thing we feel of the morning and the last thing at night.
As humans, it is instinctive - in most of us, to naturally make the best of the worst of circumstances. No matter how we must love, the important thing is that we do it. To not analyze or question...to not be so suspicious that our hearts are more consumed with doubt, anger and revenge than providing pure, nurturing love to our children.
Do not make love difficult. Let it flow. It is so simple...it just requires opening our hearts. This is not as much about the child receiving love and “feeling” it, as it is about us as parents and loved ones, giving the love and having faith it will be felt. Should we really attempt to close down our hearts because we believe the child will not feel our love, anyway? It is important to remember that our love can only be boundless if we allow it to soar.
Do our children feel our love? Perhaps sometimes we are not supposed to know all of the answers. There are certainly no guarantees in this life. There is faith, though- especially faith that our children will feel our visible or invisible presence. That tonight, our child will wish upon the same star in the sky, as us. Or, that tomorrow, a particular song on the radio or picture in an album will remind our daughter or son of us. Instead of wondering if our children feel our love, perhaps it is time to stand firm in our belief that no person or circumstance on this earth, will cause us to doubt our love is not only felt, but reciprocated. If we wonder if our children feel our love, wouldn’t it make sense that our children wonder if we feel theirs?
.
Sunday, March 6, 2011
A Children's Protective Services insider reveals "secret rules" that Children's Protective Services must follow
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=arVPZHgTcmA
Friday, October 22, 2010
Is He An Abuser Or An Abuse Expert?
In the past, actor Alec Baldwin unleashed a volcanic tirade on his daughter and supposedly called her a “rotten little pig…rude, thoughtless, little pig.” In the telephone rage, he told her she did not have the brains or decency as a human being and that her mother is a thoughtless pain in the ass. He used continuous profanity at his daughter who was 11 years old at the time. He then threatened her by yelling he was coming to see her and would “straighten your ass out when I see you.” His tone was dangerous and out of control.
This is the same man who is being hailed by some, as a Parental Alienation expert, of sorts. When people want to bring in the “big guns” they bring in Baldwin. They name drop as if association with him increases their popularity and listening audience, and it makes them more qualified and believed. In short, it is as if they somehow feel his name gives them more credibility.
A friend and I recently chatted about how a parent who abuses their child in this way, turns it all around. How does one go from abusing their child to receiving praise, acceptance and being an “expert?” Do you ever wonder how one abuser is seen as scum of the earth for their abuse and another is seen as an authority? For example, it is interesting to ponder why Baldwin is successful in “turning it around” but Mel Gibson fails. After all, Gibson has abuse allegations and other complicated issues in his life, as well. When we think about it, Gibson is a mega-star and to some, a more popular public figure than Baldwin. I don’t know about Gibson, but Baldwin’s approach was probably not “orchestrated”- that’s too strong of a word, but there was probably some degree of planning.
It starts with a huge apology. Baldwin got caught and nothing he can ever say will change this fact. Who knows if or how many other attacks have occurred like this upon his daughter. Who knows what the ex-wife has done in the past – or if she did something to provoke this incident. Because the other parent may have done something harmful, does not make child abuse acceptable. Baldwin was doomed so there was only one thing he really could do….apologize. He did it from the heart….of course, he’s an actor! Next, he learned (or experienced) enough about Parental Alienation to write a book, and became involved with the cause. He faced the world, did some public appearances and released his book. He became a crusader and people felt sorry for him because they identified with his plight.
People continuously make excuses for his behavior- as if he is not an adult. They reason that his anger was really at the ex-wife so the child “got in the way of that.” They blow it off and say he used poor judgment- after all, we all get angry. They say the courts made him do it which results in playing a huge sympathy card. They say it has been “taken out of context.” They even go so far as to call his antics “discipline.” They blame the child- it’s her fault. They consider the child’s age at the time and reflect upon how they themselves, talk to their teenager. After all, an 11 year old is “almost” a teenager and that is a turbulent time. Let’s get real…how relevant is age when we’re talking abuse? Since the eruption, Baldwin appears invested, dedicated and concerned. He seems humbled. The passing of time has helped. Oh, and it also helps to be a celebrity.
Most parents will tell you that in all of their parenting years- and even after the separation or divorce, it never occurred to them to call their child such degrading names. Let alone, act on it. There is usually a line of human decency. It may be invisible but instinctively, we are aware of its marker. If we have any conscience whatsoever, living with the fact we said such vulgar things to a daughter or son would be tough. The best designer suit, the most suave appearance, and the celebrity status will not really change who we are in our hearts and as human beings. Emmy award winners are not exempt from committing child abuse. Baldwin can practically undo his despicable behavior. Almost. Unfortunately, there is one thing that cannot be erased and that is the echo of his damaging words in his daughter’s memory.
We are going to make mistakes. There are no perfect parents, whether it is Baldwin, a therapist with a Ph.D or you and me. Still, we do not have a green light to abuse, even when there is unfairness in the courts, intense frustration and the ex provokes us. No matter how hard we may try to shift the focus from ourselves to the courts and how unfair we have been treated, we own our behavior. No one else is responsible or to blame for it.
We are either against child abuse or for it. One cannot partially abuse. There is no gray area or in-between, in the crime of child abuse. Effective, proper parenting requires adults to act like, and be, adults. Abuse is not discipline, any more than it is love…not by any stretch of the imagination. Call an abuser, an abuser. If we cannot do this, perhaps we are not fully, completely, protecting our children with every fiber of our being.
This is the same man who is being hailed by some, as a Parental Alienation expert, of sorts. When people want to bring in the “big guns” they bring in Baldwin. They name drop as if association with him increases their popularity and listening audience, and it makes them more qualified and believed. In short, it is as if they somehow feel his name gives them more credibility.
A friend and I recently chatted about how a parent who abuses their child in this way, turns it all around. How does one go from abusing their child to receiving praise, acceptance and being an “expert?” Do you ever wonder how one abuser is seen as scum of the earth for their abuse and another is seen as an authority? For example, it is interesting to ponder why Baldwin is successful in “turning it around” but Mel Gibson fails. After all, Gibson has abuse allegations and other complicated issues in his life, as well. When we think about it, Gibson is a mega-star and to some, a more popular public figure than Baldwin. I don’t know about Gibson, but Baldwin’s approach was probably not “orchestrated”- that’s too strong of a word, but there was probably some degree of planning.
It starts with a huge apology. Baldwin got caught and nothing he can ever say will change this fact. Who knows if or how many other attacks have occurred like this upon his daughter. Who knows what the ex-wife has done in the past – or if she did something to provoke this incident. Because the other parent may have done something harmful, does not make child abuse acceptable. Baldwin was doomed so there was only one thing he really could do….apologize. He did it from the heart….of course, he’s an actor! Next, he learned (or experienced) enough about Parental Alienation to write a book, and became involved with the cause. He faced the world, did some public appearances and released his book. He became a crusader and people felt sorry for him because they identified with his plight.
People continuously make excuses for his behavior- as if he is not an adult. They reason that his anger was really at the ex-wife so the child “got in the way of that.” They blow it off and say he used poor judgment- after all, we all get angry. They say the courts made him do it which results in playing a huge sympathy card. They say it has been “taken out of context.” They even go so far as to call his antics “discipline.” They blame the child- it’s her fault. They consider the child’s age at the time and reflect upon how they themselves, talk to their teenager. After all, an 11 year old is “almost” a teenager and that is a turbulent time. Let’s get real…how relevant is age when we’re talking abuse? Since the eruption, Baldwin appears invested, dedicated and concerned. He seems humbled. The passing of time has helped. Oh, and it also helps to be a celebrity.
Most parents will tell you that in all of their parenting years- and even after the separation or divorce, it never occurred to them to call their child such degrading names. Let alone, act on it. There is usually a line of human decency. It may be invisible but instinctively, we are aware of its marker. If we have any conscience whatsoever, living with the fact we said such vulgar things to a daughter or son would be tough. The best designer suit, the most suave appearance, and the celebrity status will not really change who we are in our hearts and as human beings. Emmy award winners are not exempt from committing child abuse. Baldwin can practically undo his despicable behavior. Almost. Unfortunately, there is one thing that cannot be erased and that is the echo of his damaging words in his daughter’s memory.
We are going to make mistakes. There are no perfect parents, whether it is Baldwin, a therapist with a Ph.D or you and me. Still, we do not have a green light to abuse, even when there is unfairness in the courts, intense frustration and the ex provokes us. No matter how hard we may try to shift the focus from ourselves to the courts and how unfair we have been treated, we own our behavior. No one else is responsible or to blame for it.
We are either against child abuse or for it. One cannot partially abuse. There is no gray area or in-between, in the crime of child abuse. Effective, proper parenting requires adults to act like, and be, adults. Abuse is not discipline, any more than it is love…not by any stretch of the imagination. Call an abuser, an abuser. If we cannot do this, perhaps we are not fully, completely, protecting our children with every fiber of our being.
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Friday, September 24, 2010
Financial Incentives and Placing Children into the Care of Abusers
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y0LILd0wtbU
Saturday, August 28, 2010
Wish to file a complaint against a Judge?
State Judge Unethical Misconduct Complaints
Where to file in each state - free of charge
http://www.deltabravo.net/custody/misconduct.php
Where to file in each state - free of charge
http://www.deltabravo.net/custody/misconduct.php
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
FERPA - Family Educational Rights and Privacy Act
With a new school year underway, it is crucial that parents and families read this. FERPA gives parents certain rights with respect to their children's educational records.
http://www2.ed.gov/policy/gen/guid/fpco/ferpa/index.html
http://www2.ed.gov/policy/gen/guid/fpco/ferpa/index.html
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